Also known as the “Age of Reason” in 18th Century Europe, had its roots in pursuit of happiness and liberty- sound familiar? For this week’s message I am borrowing the phrase to demonstrate how age matters. The practice of Oncology brings us in close proximity to octo and nanogenerians. This week the clinic saw several who, now vaccinated, are ‘enjoying” leaving the safety of home for healthcare. Unfortunately, the risk of cancer increases with age and some folks treated years ago now have new adventures to manage. You would think that having cancer would make this a critical time in their lives. It does not.
In fact, all the scary, threatening, life altering, and fear inducing events have already occurred. At this point they are resilient and philosophical. These patients, strikingly tough in mind, weak in body have many commonalities regardless of their strength, race, creed, sex and economic status. Most take this new diagnosis with a calm, accepting spirit. Their children hold the phone to record or have another sibling on the line. There is a sense of frenzy and fluster. The patient sits quietly, perhaps in a wheelchair, perhaps on oxygen, but usually, composed and resigned. The children or grandchildren wheel them into the exam room with wide eyes and pursed lips. The patient sits in calm peaceful resolve.
Its almost as if they are along for the ride. There are however, almost ubiquitous concerns: how will their family manage the burden of transporting them to and fro, loss of money needed for surviving spouse or challenged relative, will they need to move in with family, the impact on income lost by a care giver. Not thoughts of: will I lose my hair, be sick, or in pain, will I survive? Its almost exclusively about others. This week, the experiences were quite delightful. They each tap into my own philosophical approach to determine how best to serve their needs- health and otherwise. For three of them near or over 90, no treatment was recommended. There was chance it would cause side effects with no impact on longevity. I tell them all to see me in 6 months with another scan or sooner if symptoms develop. One quick witted man slapped me on the back as we left the room together and said, ‘Well Doc, thanks for giving me another 6 months, my kids have me in the grave but instead I’m goin’ fishin'”. We catch each others eyes knowing full well there isn’t a guarantee, but there is allowing his life to unfold as he wishes. Every single relative breathed a sigh of relief that a doc could really see the situation not the disease.
These super seniors are to be admired. They have a calm acceptance, strength and always concern for others. If we listen and respect instead of pushing and pleading, they teach us how unselfishness and generosity of spirit is all that ultimately matters. Enlightened? I surely think so.