Tag: gratitude

woman in white sweater baking cake

Thanking you

Joanne Dragun, M.D.

Thanksgiving is upon us. (Sounds as if we are being overpowered by a buffalo). So let’s try….”The holidays are here!” Yay! Whether you approach from a place of excitement or exhaustion, you will engage on some level. As witnessed last eve in St Augustine Night of Lights, thousands poured onto the streets desperate to recharge their spirits. I believe it will be a time of renewal and even healing. Let’s stop for a moment this week to honor this simple, but complex in emotions, holiday of Thanksgiving.

Over the past years I stopped asking patients plans as I saw faces drop and sometimes even tears form. I let them lead the discussion as we prepare therapy around travel and visitors. For Marvin this week, it was easy. “Doc, just set me up, at 90 I am going nowhere ‘cept to mow my lawn”. He is a character. Following a long illustrious career, he visited bikeweek with his wife on cycles and decided when retirement came to settle here. He is bright, engaging and proudly sports an old motorcycle cloth cap to cover his scars. His face lights up speaking about the mower which I suspect has replaced the bike.

I share Marvin with you because while we can all list what and who we are grateful for, we rarely include ourselves. Marvin is proud of his ability to power up, maintain and drive his mower over acres of land. He is good at it. He reminds me that for all of us, there are activities at which we excel and should celebrate. So, let’s be thankful this week for our own amazing gifts.

You may bake a delicious pie, you love to build things with precision, you are a computer genius, you are a great friend, you are a master in communications, you bring others in your book club to thoughtful engagement, you pushed yourself to learn pickleball, you care for children or grandchildren with your own child-like wonder, you overcame so very much in life to be here today, you contribute to your community or work for charity, you helped a friend through chemo by sharing your experience and guidance…..whatever you do well should be honored and celebrated.

So this Thanksgiving, let us all be thankful for our own wonderful gifts. Make it personal. Write a list of gratitude and this time make it about you. Rest assured that next year there will be even more brilliance that you have acquired. When you share your gifts with others, they will also be grateful for you.

Happy Thanksgiving.

100 Times per day

Joanne Dragun, M.D.3 Comments

Gratitude. Express it. Recently you’ve probably read that instead of saying “thank you” it is more meaningful to say “I appreciate you”.

As Einstein said, “A hundred times a day I remind myself that my inner and outer lives depend on the labors of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the measure as I have received and am still receiving.” Some have paraphrased this to say, “Einstein said ‘thank you’ a hundred time per day”. Is there a message here and what can we gain from this exercise?

A leading researcher of gratitude, Professor of Psychology and editor in Chief of Positive Psychology Robert Emmons, PhD (UC Davis) defines gratitude as a “felt sense of wonder, thankfulness and appreciation of life”. Basically, gratitude makes us happier and healthier. “Doc, what do I have to be grateful for? I have cancer.” Look at it this way: that change in your life makes it easy to express 100 statements of gratitude. Not just thanking people who support you, give you the therapy, drive you to treatments, make a meal, but even your body: your legs work, your eyes see, your thoughts guide, you have a wheelchair to get around, your vision may be poor but you can hear kind words, your thoughts may be confused but you know your loved one.

I recall an early awareness of this practice of gratitude. In first grade Sister Joseph Raphael lined us up in the hallway for the restroom (there were 98 in my class and no teacher’s aid) She would say, “Thank God for your kidneys”. I had no idea what that meant but there was “kid” in the word so I thought she meant the other kids in line (I was five) .

You express gratitude all the time but becoming more aware and deliberate in the process has benefits. Remember to be grateful for yourself too. Over your lifetime there are so many ways your body has healed or improved. Look in the mirror. Really look at yourself, not the flaws but the strength. Be grateful for your determination; you are fierce and you have the will to live. What you will find is that 100 times isn’t enough! Ultimately you begin to wash your brain of the negative and smile at the positive life affirming messages you can gift yourself every day.

Sister Joseph Raphael may have been overworked and not paid, she may have been praising God not quoting Einstein, but she knew what she was talking about. So now let me say, I am grateful for you.