The images from Helene are shocking and people wonder if they were prepared. Sadly not for this. As with the terrible storm, there may be many times in life your world spins out of control.
Everyone of us would rather avoid than suffer. Avoidance is built into our DNA. We all would agree that less is more when it comes to drama. Even with cancer we hope to find an easier path. Take lovely Natalie this week, “Doc, with my breast cancer they wanted to give me chemo but I refused. Actually I told the medical oncologist to ‘get the hell out of here, are you crazy?’ I’ve buried 4 husbands and at 87 I say enough is enough!” While we may be offered the “best care,” we must be honest regarding what is best for us or a loved one. When a disaster, a life altering event or cancer occurs, we have to appreciate the change in the trajectory. It is naive to believe that life will ever be back to normal. Just as those impacted by all the devastation recently, the desire to rebuild or remain whole is there but a new path must be forged . After the shock, recognizing this fact will bring them out from tragedy to find a new life.
It is heartbreaking, but every town and home cannot be rebuilt. Renewal is only possible with renewed perspective. Yes there is survival mode in every case. I am not suggesting whatever the drama that you give up. I am saying that you must take control. Always, what ever the threat, be in it to win it. Do not be a victim, ever.
Borrow from the strength we are witnessing. Human nature is resilient, strong, fierce, and sometimes just pissed off.
Nancy flat out says, “Screw breast cancer month! I am so mad about this”. I know better than to placate her. Nancy’s idea of control is cranky Diva. That’s OK too. On and on the visits this week are about shock, fear, sadness and then fighting, accepting and self determination.
No one is ever prepared. It’s not how life works. Think of all the fabulous, exciting, thrilling moments you have had when life wasn’t planned. Believe that the same dynamic can occur when you are challenged. Optimism will return, resilience will master the events. Acceptance will bring peace. Again and again people will take the initiative and have the perseverance to come through. No, sadly everyone won’t be saved or cured. Many will not be able to manage. We have compassion and empathy for them. But we can value strength of those who say, “Look at this mess, I lost everything, but I am alive and safe”. It’s about perspective.
There is faith that is stronger than preparedness and that light can be found in the depth of despair. Then optimism will grow from even just a little bit of hope.