Are you attempting “dry January?” While helpful, the real benefit for healthy mind and body is dry every month. Ouch, who wants to read this? No I am not preaching. Coming out of the holidays, I just need to download.

Even the staff notices that the holiday season can be a sobering time. Many routine check ups do not occur between Thanksgiving and Christmas so what we tend to see are people who enter the system due to dire situations. Too often hospitalized then suddenly finding themselves getting scans and biopsies and coming into the cancer system for care. Cancer presents in ways that demand attention this time of year. Patients who would prefer to be traveling to see family, find themselves falling from the cliff. “The nurse whispers, “Doc, everyone is so sick!” We pine for a few straight forward, easily managed cases to break the pattern.

Perhaps your own celebrations were hampered by a healthcare event. Life stops for life-threatening. What we think is important is sidelined and priorities shift.

For Tasha, I steel myself for the evaluation. What she thought was covid or even RSV is a stage four cancer in a young mother in her 30’s. With several children home and a young husband weeping at her side, there is no rosey picture to paint. We move her quickly into care as if we are the EMS rescue team. Even with my experience, delivering the shattering news overwhelms me. Propelled into exam room 2, three angels appear in the form of a tiny sprite and spitfire Minny who is 93 and her 2 daughters. They are laughing, joking and teasing their mother. Her breast cancer will be easily managed and she presents a fearless face. They collectively give me a chance to take a breath.

I just want to take this week to address an issue. You may have to deal with some very sobering times in your life and your family’s. We cannot just wish or think evil away. Hardship is hard and disruptive. You thought your time was limited by work and raising a family or caring for an elder or spouse, then you find yourself fitting in cancer treatments, surgery recovery and physical therapy sessions too. Its enough to make one drink! Don’t. But do take care of yourself. Get counseling. Find supportive friends. Focus on what needs to be done- not everything.

Cancer presents it own sobering time. Know you are not alone and that within you have amazing fortitude. Lean on others- you will give them purpose. Be brave. Remember that life isn’t happening to you, it’s happening for you. You do not have to manage, you get to manage. Trust yourself. Be gentle, pet the dog, smile which changes your brainwaves, take a walk. Life may be unfolding different to your plan. You have managed many new paths in your life. You can do this.

2024 may present challenges, but it is sure to also be filled with blessing- a friend you now can rely on, a new family member, an awakening, a new activity, new vision for your future, new mind and body growth, new successes. It’s not ever all about the cancer or the trials. The real sobering this time of year is your determination to take control, whatever the circumstances. May you find abundance, blessings, fortitude, healing, kindness and love along the way.