Becoming a better driver the past few months as I travel I- 95 for 90 miles, is a necessity. After awhile, I felt as if I had superpowers. I could anticipate the roaring motorcycle approaching at high speed from my right in the pitch dark morning, I defensibly managed the tractor trailers barreling across three lanes at 80 miles per hour…in dense fog. Even the LOL (for some of us that stands for little old lady) creeping along causing slamming brakes in the middle lane. Friday, it was a “wide load” with flashing lights all around like a carnival ride. I though I’d have a seizure if I didn’t pass but I became timid until I realized it was a large pontoon boat on a tractor trailer. Cut me a break. I’d never get to the cancer center on time if I stayed behind this obstacle and so I made a run for it. You can imagine by the time I came to the clinic, I needed a refresh if not at least a prayer of thanks. I grabbed my white coat and racing heart and enter Francine’s room.

The petite and lovely patient stares with wide eyed fear and I remove my mask to soften the introduction and smile. I pat my hair which is probably sticking straight up. The hospital bed engulfs her as these past days her world tilts. She presented with dizziness a few weeks ago then the work up ensued: scans, biopsy and the pathology revealing the cause of stage IV disease. She is still processing and in shock. She needs treatment quickly as well as understanding and support.

This scenario plays out daily, perhaps has occurred to you or a loved one. Getting control is crucial. Unfortunately, if you are in a hospital, there are many hands in the pot and with stage IV disease even before the pathology returned, she is quickly offered hospice. Glad I showed up. While I am a fan when it is necessary and I have spoken before on this topic, today is not the day. What Francine needs is to hear options. Her cancer type responds quickly to chemo even when spread. It won’t be cured but can be managed for some time, instead of succumbing in weeks without therapy. As we discuss, she starts to straighten in the bed. Her head lifts, her wide eyes turn to thoughtfulness. Once again I remind a patient they are strong- something she forgot these past two weeks. She starts to see herself escaping from that highway to hell lane and making a run for it.

Contacting medical oncology, she is quickly set up for chemo while hospitalized, the plan for radiation is set. Before I sign off, the family says, “Doc, Francine was a dancer. She worked her whole life and is physically strong. She’s just been beaten by this news. We thought her diagnosis was the end.” While this cancer set off a bomb, she deserves to be treated and then determine how far she wants to travel this journey.

Francine is going to take a chance. Informed decisions require hearing all options. This isn’t the end of the road and she starts to believe that she will be able to navigate.

There are so many new improvements: vaccines, immunotherapies, more focused radiation, less invasive surgeries. Trials are part of life, but a life well lived puts you in control. It takes fortitude and courage to push past the fear. Stand up for yourself. No one gets ahead with inertia. Seek a team of family and physicians who support you and your goals. Accept nothing less then the very best from yourself. There is everything to gain. You have people to see and places to still go.